Anna Nicholas

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Zapatero praying for time in Washington

Sorry to be a bit of a killjoy but why exactly was the socialist prime minister of Spain, José Luis Zapatero, giving an address at the ultra conservative, national prayer breakfast in Washington this week?

At a very big pinch his socialist party might purport to have agnostic leanings but in the main it has introduced sweeping reforms to clip...

Another one bites the dust in Mallorcan corruption scandal

As if the corruption scandals engulfing Majorca just couldn’t get any worse, a series of fresh allegations and arrests have been made. Rather like a Brian Rix farce it’s becoming hard to remember who’s who in the regional government as new characters embrace the spotlight only to be booed and booted off stage, more often than not in handcuffs.

In the...

Should Spain be digging up its past?

It is almost inconceivable to imagine the terror felt by poet and playwright, Federico Garcia Lorca, as he was led stumbling to his death at the hands of a right wing Nationalist death squad during the Spanish Civil War. The date was August 1936, shortly after the hostilities began, and it is believed that he was shot and dumped...

It's never just been about Maddie

When I popped into the local newsagent for my papers, the woman behind the counter began clucking when she saw a front cover image of little Madeleine McCann accompanied by a report on the latest episode in the whole sorry affair.
‘Terrible, isn’t it?’ I muttered in Spanish, fumbling for my euros. She nodded. ‘Absolutely. How could...

Is Spain right to cut off health care scroungers?

Think about it. You need a hip replacement but the NHS is overloaded, advising that it could be many months before you can ever hope of admission. Then you learn about healthcare in sunny Spain with its sumptuous public hospitals that offer excellent patient care and treatments virtually on the spot. What do you do, wait in the

A Stamp of Approval

Waiting in the queue at our local post office, the correos, I was approached by Miguel, one of the staff, who asked in confidential tones about the British postal strike. When I told him it was being called off, he touched his heart as if I’d just delivered life saving news and joyously announced the decision to the other counter...

Red Rag to a Bull? Bullfighting: it's just not cricket.

These days I’m a bit of a bulldog when it comes to bullfights.

Spanish friends have tried valiantly, over the years, to convince me that the corrida, the bullfight, is an event of historic, aesthetic, religious and cultural significance but for me it is nothing more than an outmoded and voyeuristic blood sport.

I’ve read Lorca’s Lament for Ignacio Sánchez Medíjas with...

Everyone Loves an Old Bag

Savvy Majorcans like nothing better than the odd freebie and what could be more tempting than the offer of an old bag, or to be more exact, a traditional wicker basket?

As the leading producer, and third largest consumer of plastic bags in Europe, Spain isn’t known for its commitment to recycling. But recently it seems to have had an epiphany...

House Today, Gone Tomorrow

Having a bad hair day? Try being Florentina Mora, a Majorcan chef from my local town of Sóller, who has inadvertently fallen foul of Ley de Costas, the Coastal Laws of Spain, and on November 5 will see her family’s beachside home demolished.

Florentina’s in-laws purchased this romantic old landmark on Cala Tuent beach back in the 1920s with all the...

Stephen Gately: A Tragic End to a Holiday

There I was pottering down one of Palma’s long, leafy avenues today en route to a meeting when I came across a complete scrum of media with zoom lenses poised and cameras ready to roll. Too curious to walk on by I approached them and asked in Spanish whether someone famous was about to arrive. ‘Do you speak English?’ a...

You Say Majorca, I say Mallorca...

Oh here we go again. When I first came to live on the island of Mallorca, I couldn’t get that oafish rhyme out of my head of, the water in Majorca don’t taste like it oughta, and it started me questioning how the word really oughta be pronounced. The local British newspaper, inaugurated in 1962, is called the Majorca Daily...

Growing Up Is a Risky Business

My twelve year old son, Ollie, came home from his Spanish school, talking about a great trip he’d just had, visiting a newspaper printing works and a radio station in Palma. Did I have a problem with that? Absolutely not, but I found it odd that once again, I knew nothing about it beforehand. In his previous English school we...

Is It Cool to Kiss Babies?

It never ceases to amaze me how here in Mallorca it is customary to see men of all ages making complete fools of themselves in the presence of babies and children. Yesterday for example, I was on my way home from the local market when I noticed a young, bronzed Adonis bobbing up and down by a parked car while...

Whatever Happened To Mr Mayor?

There’s been much in the media about the lack of civic involvement in sorting out local street crime in the UK and I think it’s a fair point. Where is the mayor when you need him? In truth, I’ve lost track of exactly what a mayor in the UK is supposed to do, aside from rattle his chains and glide...

Have Overpriced Restaurants Had their Chips?

I’ve just received a surprising invitation to sample free canapés every Friday night at the Palma based restaurant, Fosh Foods. Why am I surprised? Simply because Marc Fosh, the only British chef in Spain to have received a Michelin Star, has thrown off his mink mantle and opted for chic and cheap. So sure is he that times are changing...

Hidden Treasures

This may be the season of mist and mellow fruitfulness back in Blighty but in Majorca it’s the beginning of the seta season, or to be truly Majorcan, the month for bolets, mushrooms. With Maria, the mushroom queen of our valley, leading me astray early one morning in the Tramuntana mountains, I discovered why fungi gathering has become an...

All About a Goat

There’s a frisson of excitement in Soller, my local rural town, and it’s all thanks to a dead goat. One hundred years ago, an eccentric Edwardian scientist named Dorothea Bate from the Natural History Museum in London, came to rugged and tourist-free Majorca and found, in the deep recesses of a sea cave, the oddly shaped cranium and jaw bone...

Goodbye to All That

Now that I live in Majorca I often guiltily recall, how despite living in central London with museums and art galleries practically tripping me up on the doorstep, I rarely got round to visiting many. Of course I blamed the stress of London life and work but I really should have made more effort. Yesterday, in glorious sunshine, I found...

Top 5 Must Read Books for July!

Well, having suffered a week or gastroenteritis, an experience my 12 year son Ollie was also lucky enough to share with me (ho ho) I at least had a little cheer-me-up moment this morning with the following review from St Christopher’s Inns publication and website:

‘‘Goats From A Small Island by Anna Nicholas’‘
‘No one is more of an authority...

Unleashed from the crypt!

Ok, that’s a tad dramatic. My little cellar isn’t so very crypt-like although the white walls, unpadded as yet, and the general silence would without doubt appeal to a trapist monk. Well, dear readers, I have finally put my next little tome to bed and to say I am maaaaaa’d out would be an understatement. For some months now I...

Goats from a small island-Grabbing Mallorcan Life by the Horns

The time has come to announce the forthcoming tome. Sorry dear readers but there WILL be another and this time I am taking Myotragus as my theme. My, er, WHAT???? You might well be forgiven for not knowing about this little creature, which translated from the Greek means, ‘mouse goat’. Until about five thousand years ago this dwarfed...

Shopping Frenzy

It’s a funny old thing, but whenever I enthuse about my regular shopping forays to our local town of Sóller, London friends view me with some skepticism. How, they ask, can I find the weekly grind of grocery shopping so enthralling? Well, I say, shopping in our town is not a perfunctory affair but more of a social event, an...

Miguel the Toro

Something I haven’t been aware of in the UK before but which is alive and well in Mallorca, is the parking pitch phenomenon. Driving into Palma on a busy day when parking is near impossible in any of the underground car parks or on the street, we head for the small plaça by Es Baluard museum in the hope that...

Bored Stiff

So a clever professor at Michigan University has discovered that when we are bored our brains simply disconnect. In a simple experiment, placing volunteers under an MRI scanner and showing them streams of numbers, he was able to ascertain that our self control, vision and language become greatly affected by boredom. Now this is very opportune research as far...

Thin Londoners

A record is soon to be announced by the government. Apparently Britain will shortly be able to hold its head up high and proclaim itself the world’s fattest nation. America is currently the reining king but we are fast catching up as the nation of fat. Isn’t that something to be proud of? Well when back in London recently, I...

Christmas Elf & Safety lollipop Ban

Santa’s happy elves are working 24/7 to get those presents wrapped up in time for the big day but in one part of Hampshire, a breakaway group of killjoy elves are hell bent on making Christmas a misery for locals. In festive mode, school crossing patrol officer, Kevin Simpson, decided to attach glittery tinsel to the top of his lollipop...

Dreaming of a White Christmas

A vicar in Dorset has announced that he is banning the hymn, O Little Town of Bethlehem, from his church this Christmas because it is outmoded and doesn’t reflect the conflict happening on the West Bank. Shocked by a recent visit there, Mr Coulter cannot now tolerate this festive ditty because he maintains that Bethlehem isn’t a nice little town...

CHILD’S PLAY

During the summer a Mallorcan friend begged me to teach English to her daughter. I hesitated. After all I’m not a qualified teacher and lessons with a Mallorcan speaking seven year old sounded like a bit of a challenge. Finally I agreed. After all it would only be for the holiday period. ‘That’s great’, she enthused, ‘because I now have...

Wrapping up Christmas

All being well, in a couple of days time my husband, son and I will be in Colombo, Sri Lanka, to share some Christmas spirit with 70 orphaned girls from 3 to 17 years old in a small orphanage on the perimeter of the city. What’s that got to do with sunny Spain you may ask? Nothing at all. Well,...

The Wild Woman of Borneo

Well, appallingly, I see that I have failed to submit a piece to my own website for some months. Tsk Tsk. What kind of writer am I? Still, I hope I might fall on your mercy, dear reader, given that I have just arrived back, jet lagged and grimy (40 hours in transit-4 flights and 13 hours on bumpy tracks)...

Just a Minute

For fans of the long-running Radio 4 show, Just a Minute, I hear from my friend, Nicholas Parsons, the show’s chairman, that the new series is currently being recorded and taken out on the road around the UK. Interestingly Just a Minute, which you can tune into via the BBC website began in 1967 and is now in its...

Chippies shaking with despair

Chippies across the north of England and Scotland are digging a hole for themselves-quite literally. It transpires that new regulations at Gateshead Council have put an end to salt shakers with seventeen holes being used in local fish and chip shops to cut down on salt consumption. The chippies dilemma is that the largest supplier of salt shakers in the...

A Sporting Chance

It came as no surprise that a school in the UK has banned sports day for fear of one of the children stumbling on loose mud or twisting an ankle on a random mole hill. It is indeed laughable but England has become such a nanny state that this sort of utter tosh is now the norm. Long gone are...

I'm Alright Says Tom!

Why is it that politicians never learn when to keep their traps shut? If things weren’t bad enough for our Gordie, he now has his rubber-band mouth Transport Minister, Tom Harris, lecturing the nation on how lucky they are. With food bills up, house prices sliding into oblivion, pay rises below inflation and petrol costs going through the roof, this...

A Non-Human War

Some months ago I contacted a raft of global animal charities about a story of a mistreated street dog in Brazil which countless friends had asked me to investigate. Most organisations were hugely helpful and one in particular sent me regular news and then began sending me updates on animal cruelty worldwide. It’s an outfit based in the States and...

Lonely Freedom Fighter

All hail David Davis! The man is a veritable God. For once a politician has had the guts and garters to stand up for what he believes in. I have always thought Mr Davis rather grey and mousy but no, he is a true lion in rodent clothing. May Gordon and his ghastly nannying team quake in their boots as...

Getting Crabby

Much as I rarely agree with our nannying government poking its nose in our daily affairs, I do have a little sympathy with Norfolk Coast Partnership for its concern about the plight of crabs caught by children on beaches. My sister and I used to go crabbing in Wales and we rarely caught more than a few and always returned...

Heart of Stone

There are few things worse than a fool sounding off on a subject he knows nothing about except perhaps when it comes to a Hollywood icon spouting on world affairs. Gabbling breathlessly at the Cannes film festival, actress Sharon Stone surmised that the devastating earthquake in China which has claimed countless lives, was probably due to China’s Karma. In a...

Don't Cry for Me London!

If anyone thought Ken Livingstone would be weeping with his newts having lost the mayoral race, they can think again. Within a few weeks of defeat, our Ken is happy again having managed to secure hugely lucrative after dinner speaking contracts with a top London firm. He is rumoured to have secured more than £100,000 in speaking fees already. Unlike...

Willie Won't He?

So, thumbs up to Willie Walsh, chief executive of British Airways for snubbing a ten percent bonus of £700,000, to indicate his remorse for the extraordinary fiasco that unrolled at the opening of Terminal 5. It would be foolish to imagine Willie didn’t want the dosh. His canny reasoning for not taking the money was that he’d have been eaten...

Ramsey the food tsar

It always seems incredibly bad taste for one super chef to sound off about another, and none more so than in the case of bruiser Gordon Ramsey, who as self appointed food Tsar of Britain, has lambasted Delia Smith for giving the thumbs up to tinned food, and other chefs for using vegetables and fruit out of season. Ramsey believes...

Jacqui Jobsworth

One of Gordon Brown’s biggest mistakes was awarding the post of Home Secretary to the ineffectual and dreary Jacqui Smith whose robotic voice could challenge that of a Dalek in any voiceover competition. Time and time again she has made embarrassing gaffes and naïve, contradictory statements which show just how out of touch the government really is about the state...

Boris on a Roll

It’s hard not to get caught up in the excitement of what is happening in London with bouncy Boris Johnson at the helm. Much as it’s the glorious honeymoon period for the new Mayor of London, one has to admire his shrewd early moves which are impressing Londoners across the Capital. He has already appointed a tier of bright, no-nonsense,...

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© Anna Nicholas